Thursday 19 March 2009

The Perfect Career

I lie here unable to sleep once again so I thought I’d write down some of what was on my mind. I find myself thinking of what I want to do after I finish this degree.

I think now I have nearly given up on my dream of being a professional footballer.

The ability just hasn’t materialized as I hoped. Of course I have done very little to achieve these abilities. I was just kind of hoping for it to just happen.
I would have liked the pace and finishing of Torres, the drive and determination of Gerrard, the quick feet and silky skills of Messi, the perfect 10 achieved by Ronaldo in the diving, the smooth baldy round weapon that is Zindane’s head and the ability to survive throughout the Ice age that Rooney seems to possess.

With these qualities combined I would then use them to invent a new sport. Ice diving. Basically it’s just jumping of a cliff in the Arctic into some ice. My smooth baldy head will break through the ice with no damage to my brainbox and my caveman stature will allow me to stay alive in the freezing cold.

I think I’ll pitch it towards Americans; they are stupid enough to do it.

Anyway if this journalism stuff doesn’t work out I’ll just become a rock star. Hell, how hard can it be? I mean if Miley Cyrus can get a record deal and The Moldy Peaches can put this on a album - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fjSnlvGHOWA - (I actually love that song) I figure I’ll just turn up and they will fall to my feet in awe.

I have also been trying to get work experience for a while now and although I have sent three, count them - one - two - three emails to NME I have yet to get a response. Now this is just rude. So from now on I am engaging in open warfare with NME. Well not so much warfare, I’ll still buy it… and read the website… and follow blindly whoever they say is the next big thing.

(Seriously. White Lies? They are just another version of Interpol. Who were crap to start of with. Although I do like Farewell To The Fairground. Mainly because it sounds like The Rascals.)

But anyway I’m starting my email blitz. I think one a day for a while and then increase it to one every hour until I get a reply even if its ‘stop emailing us, you creep. We will contact the authorities’. That’s a win in my eyes.

Track of the Blog
All I Want Is You – Barry Louis Polisar

Makes me want to learn the guitar just so I can strum along to this. Lovely stuff.

Album of the Blog
Juno Soundtrack

Although the film is actually appalling, the soundtrack is genius. Filled with soft acoustic melodies, it’s enough to make anyone fall in love.

PEACE OUT

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